Oldest graduate finally pays off loan.

Sunday January 12 2070


This week saw the final repayment of a student loan by a former student who graduated fifty years ago in 2020. This makes her the oldest student to date to finally pay off the student loan. We caught up with her as she waved off another boatload of tourists for the ‘Monster Loch Experience’ tour on Loch Ness. Her role as a tour guide is the most recent of a series of temporary and part-time jobs that she has had in a long career. Now eighty seven years old, she shows no sign of stopping work. Ivana Mooretyme graduated as a mature student of Media Studies at the age of thirty seven back in 2020. By then she had three children, Annie, Justin and Lottie.

The ‘incident’ coincided with her graduation and negative inflation at that time meant that her pay looked unlikely to advance in the near future. She told us that she had accumulated over £57,000 in debt for maintenance loans and fees during her time as a student. “Even then I had to work 20 or so hours a week in a cinema to make ends meet”. Her passion for films and theatre was evident and she clearly likes working with the public. However, she said that she never expected to pay off the full loan as the government said it would right-off all of the loans and had even reduced this to 20 years. “The loan book was sold to a private company, Coylock Lifelong Investments, in 2026 and I did not expect them to keep coming after me” she said.

Unfortunately the ‘incident’ of 2019 and the following financial crisis meant that by 2027 the minority Socialist Conservative United Momentum (SCUM) government had reversed its decision on all loans. They all had to be paid in full within the life-time of the student. This came as a significant blow to Ivana as she planned for retirement.

We asked her if the Media Studies degree had been worth it overall and had it helped in her prospects. She said, “I enjoyed my time at uni but it was a struggle with the kids in tow. As for jobs, I continued working part-time doing front of house in the cinema until it closed in 2030. After that I was unemployed for a time. Then I had various jobs including working abroad as a tour guide in Brussels. But all the time the loan company was sending threatening emails and making phone calls. On one occasion I was met at the ferry port by one of their officials who made me pay there and then by credit card. It was very scary”

We asked why she was still paying off the debt so late in her life. She said, “I slipped in and out of the country for several “seasonal jobs” helping various small import companies and for a while they lost track of me. I had to keep the work low key you know”.

Eventually she decided to settle back in the Former UK States (FUKS) but still had to work. The loan repayments continued but the accumulated interest and penalties for late and non-payment had added to the burden.

Then she added a surprise. “This morning I received an email from Coylock Lifelong Investments. They appear to have miscalculated the repayments.” 

She showed us the communication that held the surprise.

“Dear Ms Mooretyme,

Unfortunately we have found a discrepancy in our calculations dating back to the transfer from £FUK currency to the universal Bitcoin currency in 2032. The correct currency exchange rate was not used by the Coylock management in place then. An inquiry by the new FUKS government carried out since last May has concluded that a major fraud had been perpetrated. The news will appear in the media soon, but we have decided to contact you in advance of this. It appears that you have overpaid your student loan repayments by 32,456₿. We enclose a non-liability agreement for you to sign and ask you to indicate which account you would like the back payment to be credited to. Please respond within five days.

Yours

Anthony Bassanio".

"Things are finally looking up" she said wearily.

27 comments:

  1. We are really grateful for your blog post. You will find a lot of approaches after visiting your post. I was exactly searching for. Thanks for such post and please keep it up. Great work. builders loan rates

    ReplyDelete
  2. A Loan isn't so simple of getting the loan quickly with a time of intense problem so choose a quick secured loan that's acquirable. www.nowloan.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
  3. The understudies looking for university of Toronto confirmation are needed to settle on the program they wish to seek after and check in the event that they satisfy the affirmation models for the concerned division. SEO no cure no pay

    ReplyDelete
  4. For instance, if in the HSC, you did very well for financial matters and will in general appreciate the subject, pick Commerce or Economics at university. Best PhD Thesis Writing Service

    ReplyDelete
  5. We have sell some products of different custom boxes.it is very useful and very low price please visits this site thanks and please share this post with your friends. Payday Loan Consolidation

    ReplyDelete
  6. I wanted to thank you for this excellent read!! I definitely loved every little bit of it. I have you bookmarked your site to check out the new stuff you post. National Payday Loan Relief | Payday Loan Consolidation

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am jovial you take pride in what you write. It makes you stand way out from many other writers that can not push high-quality content like you. 借錢

    ReplyDelete
  8. A fast Internet look for "credit fix administration" yields 13 million outcomes. It is a major business! Yet, what precisely does a credit fix administration do? The cases can appear unrealistic.cheap credit score
    strong credit repair

    ReplyDelete
  9. Isn't it disturbing that a large number of students are either indebted or forced to take up temporary and part-time jobs to cover their education expenses? For me, it is really disturbing. Dissertation Writing Services

    ReplyDelete
  10. Faxless payday loans, payday loans no fax, online payday loans - they are all the same thing. Quick cash for those times when life throws you a curve ball just when you least needed it! Find out from a professional debt expert just what is involved... payday loan consolidation

    ReplyDelete
  11. If this happens it is recommended that you contact your payday loan provider as soon as possible and explain your circumstances to them. national payday loan relief

    ReplyDelete
  12. I’m usually to blogging and that i really appreciate your articles. The actual article has really highs my personal curiosity. I am going to bookmark your own site and maintain checking for brand spanking new info. assignment essay dissertation ppt provider

    ReplyDelete
  13. Both pay-per-click and SEO are targeted to get your website placed as close to the top of search engine results as possible. Marketing and SEO are different, yet very, very similar. SEO are considered as the main factors in enhancing the traffic of one's website. The concepts of good SEO are hardly a secret. The people who least understands issues with URL structure and SEO are the very people who create them: web developers, programmers, and software developers. cheap web hosting

    ReplyDelete
  14. Search Engine Optimization can be a powerful Internet marketing tool but it's not always the right tool for the job. Here's 5 reasons why you should NOT do SEO for your website.. https://hostinglelo.in/

    ReplyDelete
  15. This sort of instructor may barely identify the actual constant pre-conceptions as well as problem the actual myths associated with college studentsmejores escuelas cdmx

    ReplyDelete
  16. you will need support or suggestions, write me privately.
    I interested in your implementation/use case.
    the best kera4d
    Togel2win

    ReplyDelete
  17. However, a secured loan is definitely the one the location where the potential borrower would have to secure security or security against which the lender will lend money. 무설정아파트론

    ReplyDelete
  18. Qualifying for a loan on an investment property can be difficult for several investors, considering the rules and regulations required to meet, financial concerns for a down payment or credit ratings to qualify for a particular loan, so as you continue on in this article find out the difference and breakdown of conventional and non-conventional loans to give you a better sense of what to expect as you apply for a home loan. Conventional Loans - Conventional loans are any mortgage loan that is not guaranteed or insured by the federal government however they are considered... corporate loan singapore

    ReplyDelete
  19. Trying to get any kind of loan can be a real pain, especially with bad credit. Cobra Bad Credit Loans can help though, apply today at cobrapaydayloans.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
  20. How to Get A Good Casino (EANBONUS) in Vegas
    How to 1xbet скачать earn a casino bonus? Casino. 라이브스코어사이트 A casino 인디언 포커 offers hundreds of games, including 수 있습니다 slots, blackjack, roulette, and craps, 슬롯머신 and a

    ReplyDelete
  21. After reading your article I was amazed. I know that you explain it very well. And I hope that other readers will also experience how I feel after reading your article. avant mortgage

    ReplyDelete
  22. near abandonment or the people who have exorbitant financing cost contract loans like those called sub-prime loans. avant singapore loan for property

    ReplyDelete
  23. Unsecured loans are the ones which do not require any kind of security that is to be assured to the loan lender.작업대출

    ReplyDelete
  24. There you can download for free, see the first of these data. double kodachi

    ReplyDelete
  25. Amazing, this is great as you want to learn more, I invite to This is my page. Loans for doctors

    ReplyDelete
  26. An integral part of human life is do sports. https://mt-totosite.com

    ReplyDelete

Origins of the Rees-Mogg Registry and world standardisation of units

Timeline Sunday July 27 2070 A little known fact about the ‘incident’ of 2019 emerged in recent days that should serve as a warning for...